And…here we go!
1. The first rule of working in an office and getting along is establish dominance by drinking the last dribble of coffee, eating the food brought in by co-workers and leaving fresh-from-the-litter-pan-presents in the bosses dark-colored chair every morning. Then whenever anyone expresses their displeasure, relay the passage you read in your copy of The Anarchist Cookbook last night while cleaning one of your many assault rifles and planning the next meeting with your lawyer to finalize the settlement with your last employer.
2. I once gave my kids “sea mushrooms” for supper, but really they were canned clams. (It was a punishment, btw, for ditching the school bus and trying to skip school. It worked so well, they’ve never tried to skip since.)
3. When I think of carnivals I think of cotton candy, popcorn, candy apples and crazy-looking, inbred and toothless pedophiles running the controls on the Himalaya and taking tickets at the Fun House.
4. Lilacs are my favorite spring flower.
5. Things on my desk include an open box of Whoppers, a 2 liter of Diet Coke, a new box of Stridex, Maggie’s homework that she’s standing here waiting for help on, Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank (I just finished writing the review for it), a half-empty bag of Cheesy Poofs, and the little fliers about our town that I picked up from the city building (I put them in the books I send out from BookMooch).
6. The gas company and the gov’tal bureaucracy makes me wanna go postal then go survivalist… better yet, let’s go “Fight Club” on them!
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to taking the kids to the new skating rink that’s suppose to be Chuck E. Cheese meets SkateWorld and is probably priced like Disney World, tomorrow my plans include taking Maggie the old skating rink for her friend’s b-day party and trying to get as much of Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet read as possible and Sunday, I want to enjoy a nice Sunday Service and grab the Kleenex while Mags and Gwen get baptized at our new church!
Filed under: Friday Fill-Ins | Tagged: baptism, birthday party, bookmooch, bureaucracy, candy apples, carnies, carnival, Celia Rivenbark, Cheesy Poofs, Chuck E. Cheese, church, clams, cotton candy, Diet Coke, Disney World, Fight Club, Friday Fill-Ins, fun house, gas company, go postal, government, himalaya, hotel on the corner of bitter and sweet, Lilacs, meme, pedophile, sea mushrooms, SkateWorld, Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank, Stridex, The Anarchist Cookbook, Whoppers, workplace relations |
In the Shadow of Mt. TBR 
Your desk sounds similar to mine in how much is on it (including food). 🙂 Hehe. I love your clam punishment. I’ll have to remember that for when I become a mom.
OMG number one was so funny. Just what i needed after a horrible week at work.
I love your desk contents. I think I need to up grade my packet of cashews to twisties (I dont really know what cheesy poofs are as they arent here in Aust).
Your first three answers are so funny, and you’re such a good writer. I think your desk probably looks a lot like mine, including the Diet Coke. Hope it’s a good weekend for your family.
you are hilarious!! loved #2….I should have thought of that when my kids were younger!
the new skating rink sounds scary…I always hated having to go to Chucky Cheese
sunday sounds awesome! having your kids baptized is so specialy!!
Hahahahaha… #2 is hilarious! I’m still laughing and imagining the hard times your kids had during that supper 🙂
And your answers for #1 also work very well in a shared flat, I don’t know how many wars we fought on “who ate my grapes?”
By the way, I need that cardboard box to send things away, I’m moving in 3 weeks 🙂
Have a reat weekend!
This was funny! “Sea Mushrooms” LOL!!
Oh my god. I laughed so much! Like the ‘sea mushroom’ idea too. Might use that one myself. They might go nicely with our magical fairy trees (broccoli) x
LOL. Nice answer! Mine is up as well. Have a great week ahead!
Cheers,
Nita
Yay! You’re back! Although I still thought last week’s answers were good too. It sounds like we have been to the same nasty carnivals at some point. So glad they aren’t around here anymore because I would never let my kids go there when they were little. Ick. Have a great weekend!
Oh man…#1…I wish!!!