Author: Janet Evanovich
Paperback: 321 pages
“You’re ruining everything,” Stuart said to me. “Why can’t you leave me alone? Who’s going to be Mr. Cluck if you take me in?”
I pulled the cuffs out of my pocket. “Don’t give me a hard time, Stuart.”
“You can’t put cuffs on Mr. Cluck!” Stuart said. “What will all these kids think?”
“Wouldn’t get my hopes up that they’d give a hello,” Lula said. “Isn’t like you’re Santa Claus. Truth is, you’re just some whiny little guy dressed up in a bad suit.”
“This isn’t a big deal,” I said to Stuart as calmly as possible. “I’m going to cuff you and walk you out the door, and if we do it quickly and quietly no one will notice.”
I reached out to snap the cuffs on Stuart, and he batted me away with his chicken wing. “Leave me alone,” Stuart said, knocking the cuffs out of my hand, sending them sailing across the room. “I’m not going to jail!” He grabbed the mustard and the special-sauce squirters off the condiment counter. “Stand back!” he said.
I had pepper spray and a stun gun, but it seemed like the excessive force to use them against a chicken armed with special sauce.
–Three to Get Deadly by Janet Evanovich, page 236
In this third book of Evonovich’s Stephanie Plum novels, Stephanie back in the Buick, even though she tried to replace it with a cute little truck that spends more time in the shop than on the road. She’s caught what she’d thought was a couple easy skips, but have turned out to be like trying to find Jimmy Hoffa and capturing Dilinger. What’s worse, Morelli is treating her diffidently, while Ranger seems to be a superhero, and Grandma Mazur keeps bringing men over (her studmuffins) who seem to want to move in with the family (some have all their original parts, while others plop their replacement parts on the dinner table while eating). If that’s not bad enough, Stephanie gets a bad dye job making her look like Ronald McDonald’s Jersey cousin. It’s all very hilarious and quite a fun read.
I give Three to Get Deadly by Janet Evanovich 3 1/2 out of 5 stars. It’s not the best Plum, but still quite fun to read. (Wow, that was about the shortest review EVER!.. at least, for me.)