Post-It Note Tuesday! GLEEk for It!

I saw this meme on someone’s blog last week (forget whose, but I’ll remember right after I click “Publish”), then was reminded of the meme by Rebecca’s post today, Lost in Books:  Post-It Note Tuesday #2.  As soon as I saw it last week, I ran over to SupahMommy and got the direction on how to play.  I remember, as a kid, when Post-Its became all the rage, and we used to write goofy stuff all over them, tag each others books, bags, lockers… bodies, even!  Those and the label gun were enough to see me through my teenage angst.

So naturally I HAVE to play 😀  You can visit Superstickies and make your own Post-It notes, which can give you hours of fun all on it’s own 🙂

First up, my Ode to GLEE Post-It:

Glee's balloon quote

After watching the first four episodes of GLEE, I ran out to Wal-Mart and bought season one.  Honestly, I might like this show more than Stargate, LOST, and Star Trek combined!

Other Post-Its I had fun making 🙂

don't go commando!

your real dad is a carnie!

I actually say this to my children, by the way. A for-real quote from The Kool-Aid Mom.

about as funny as a rubber crutch

Actually, my dad's favorite way of telling me my pranks and jokes had gone to far was, "You're about as funny as a rubber crutch"

shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor

This was a joke I heard when I was about Maggie's age. There were a whole bunch of Mommy! Mommy! jokes, but this is the only one I remember.

jealous of my voices

Okay, I actually stole this from my nephew's t-shirt collection 🙂

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Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar by Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein

Title:  Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar… Understanding Philosophy Through Jokes

Authors:  Thomas Cathcart & Daniel Klein

Paperback:  196 pages

published:  2008

ISBN:  9780143113874

An Irishman walks into a Dublin bar, orders three pints of Guinness, and drinks them down, taking a sip from one, then a sip from the next, until they’re gone.  He then orders three more.  The bartender says, “You know, they’d be less likely to go flat if you bought them one at a time.”

The man says, “Yeah, I know, but I have two brothers, one in the States, one in Australia.  When we all went our seperate ways, we promised each other that we’d all drink this way in memory of the days when we drank together.  Each of these is for one of my brothers and the third is for me.”

The bartender is touched, and says, “What a great custom!”

The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar and always orders the same way.

One day he comes in and orders two pints.  The other regulars notice, and a silence falls over the bar.  When he comes to the bar for his second round, the bartender says, “Please accept my condolences, pal.”

The Irishman says, “Oh, no, everyone’s fine.  I just joined the Mormon Church, and I had to quit drinking.”

-“Illogical Reasoning,” Plato and a Platypus Walks into a Bar… by Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein, page 29

In Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar… by Thomas Cathcart & Daniel Klein the authors use jokes to illustrate a wide variety of philosophical schools of thought.  Sometimes they do it with great intelligence and deftness, sometimes not so much.  Most of the jokes are quite funny, with an occasional belly-buster, but some do fall a little flat.

But the jokes are only a vehicle for the authors to open the door for the layman to understand different philosophical thoughts.  For the most part, they are successful in this venture, but there are a few sections which I didn’t understand any better after reading them than I did before.  Overall, however, the book seems to be meant only to introduce the reader to philosophy, leaving it to them to explore different concepts on their own. 

Two cows are standing in the pasture.  One turns to the other and says, “Although pi is usually abbreviated to five numbers, it actually goes on into infinity.”

The second cow turns to the first and says, “Moo.” -“Metaphysics,” page 20

What this book really accomplishes is make philosophy accessable to readers who have had little to no exposure to it.  After reading, I also want to look into some of the philosophers mentioned in this book.  For readability and for inspiring me to get MORE books, I give Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar… by Thomas Cathcart & Daniel Klein 4 out of 5 stars.

An eighty-year-old woman bursts into the men’s day-room at the retirement home.  She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces, “Anyone who can guess what I have in my hand can have sex with me tonight!”

An old man in the back shouts, “An elephant?”

The woman thinks for a moment and says, “Close enough!” -“Philosophy of Language,” page 141

By the way, the website is pretty cool, as well.  You can watch videos as well as take tests and read the authors’ latest news.  Check out Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar… the website.

Wait, How Did You Find Me?!

Okay, I had so much fun doing the last search results post, That Brought You Here?!? That I wanted to do another.

When I was scrolling down my stats page, one of the search terms caught my eye, and I wondered if enough time had passed to post another.  It’s been over a week so… YuP! 😀  Here goes.  The search terms are in bold, btw.

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bad effects of eating your boogers ~ Nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea… yeah!

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spray cheese ~ on cracker… eat immediately.

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sex with sleeping doll ~ I believe this is illegal, and you knowChatty Cathy’s watching and’ll tell everyone…

.

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william shakespeare (dr. faustus) ~ Dr. Faustus, meet William Shakespeare 🙂

compare anne frank to the book thief! ~ NO! I don’t wanna!

I won't do it!  NOOOOO!      NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!      You can't make me!

invention of “invisible shirt”~ Yeah, I’m selling them out of my invisible store, and they come with an invisible receipt. I guarantee all eyes will be on you when you wear the matching invisible pants. I’ll sell both to you and throw in a pair of invisible Nikes all for a visible $20 bill. 😀

gary larsen plant comics~ Personally, I plant vegetables and herbs, maybe a few annuals, but hey… to each his own. I wonder if any of his comics have been famous? Tom Arnold must of been a bad year for the old winyard, eh?

isabel ice custard ~ It’s the movie version of Custard the Dragon. When Isabel, Ink, Wink, Mustard and Custard are flying over the Andes on their way to a rugby match, the plane crashes and they are forced to do the unthinkable to survive. Custard kept crying for his nice safe cage, until Isabel couldn’t take it anymore and turned him into Dragon tartar.

half-blood prince’s comments on love pot ~ He said, “Dude… DUDE… duuuuuude…. ya gotta try this pot…. one long drag and you like… totally love everyone. *puff.. puff… blow* DuuUuuuUuDe! I love you, man!”

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Then there are a few Vampire ones:

where can i read vampire kisses blood~ Anywhere you want, dawg, as long as you buy something every couple hours so the don’t think you’re loitering, home slice.

cheap: vampire kisses: blood relatives ~ This would be the Redneck family reunion slash speed dating slash wedding version.

read vampire kisses vol 2 free ~ Dude… it’s called the LIBRARY.  If that’s not free enough for you, I don’t know what to tell ya.  Get the audio book?  Except it’s a manga book.  Have someone read it for you, then transfer the memory into your brain…  It’d probably have horrible side-effects, and you’d probably grow a tail and develop a tic, but it’d be free.

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And… of course… there are all of the BOOGER searches, some of which made me swallow my tongue…

is it dangerous to eat your boogers?  Yes, that’s why you look left, then right, then left again before taking a nibble… oh, wait, that’s crossing the street.

how to eat boogers ~ Now… mind you, I’m no expert on this, but it seems fairly straight forward…  freshly picked, breaded and deep-fried and served with marinara sauce, right?

cure smelly boogers ~ Dude!  Stop sniffing your gym shoes!  Get some Odor-Eaters or something!

im 18 and still eat boogers, and 20 years old and eats boogers why~ Seriously, an even better question is WHY did GOOGLE think I knew the answers?!

throw poo ~ okay… here you go…

I'm throwing POO at you!

What are some of the weird search terms that have led people to your blog? Or what’s the oddest search you’ve ever done?

Sir John Hargrave’s Mischief Maker’s Manual

Title: M3: Sir John Hargrave’s Mischief Maker’s Manual

Author: Sir John Hargrave

Publisher: Grosset & Dunlap (div of the Penguin Group)

Publish Date: June 11, 2009

ISBN: 9780448449821

Miscellaneous: This is an advance uncorrected proof and not the finished copy.

The Prankster’s Code

There are six fundamentals of mischief making, a set of rules that will guide and protect you throughout your pranking career. Just as a Boy Scout can stay alive in the wilderness by cooking and eating a bear, your chances of staying out of trouble will be greatly improved if you follow these six basic concepts. 

A: Always be careful.
B: Don’t be a Bully.
C: Be Creative.
D: No lasting Damage.
E: Excellence in pranking.
F: Be Funny.

-Sir John Hargrave’s Mischief Maker’s Manual, page 23

Sir John Hargrave’s Mischief Maker’s Manual (hereafter referred to simply as the M3) is, as the title suggests, a manual for young pranksters.  It provides some  stories of legendary proportions in the history of pranking, and proclaims the M3 Institute’s desire for excellence and creativity in mischief making.  Above all, the pranking youngster is to follow the Prankster’s Code, with particular attention to being careful that no one is injured and that no lasting damage is done.

This book mainly seems to be written for boys, ages 9-15 year old, both in its language and references and in the 1950s reminiscent illustrations.  Girls like to prank, too.  As a mother (who pranked) of three girls (all of whom prank), I can assure you that a girl likes to pull a trick just as much as a boy does.  But by the end of the book, I was getting the feeling that this was bad-girl-behaviour on my part.  Sexism aside, I found myself chuckling and snickering at several jokes, made mental notes of a few I’d like to pull (foaming toilet comes to mind), and shared several of the ideas with my kids and their friends.

Some excellent aspects of this book are that it is geared for kids who might not see science, history, math, etc, as subjects worthy of their attention, but this book promotes all these things, including explaining the science behind why a trick works.  Also, it encourages children to keep their rooms clean, do housework, get good grades, etc, so as to be above suspicion and to curry favor of the one who holds the purse strings.  It may be a little bit of bribery, but to me it seems more like psychology… while they may be doing good for nefarious reasons, they’ll be developing good habits that will outlast their prankery. 

A major thing I like about this book is that the author acknowledges “boys will be boys,” and you may as well try to rein them in to safety.  By repetitive instruction to NOT aim sling shots at people, not to use live animals in pranks, and to never do anything that might be unsafe, we can hope that students of the M3 will not harm themselves or those around them.  One particular inserted text box admonishes: 

Even though the first three letters of the word “catapult” spell “cat,” do not attempt to launch cats from catapults.  This goes for kittens also. -page 157

The author also stresses the point that not only should one’s prank not cause lasting damage, but the easier the clean-up the better.  He recommends using only water in water balloons, to use said balloons only in the summer AND near the pool, that way everyone can enjoy the joke (they’re hot and already planning to get wet). 

The only negative thoughts I have about the M3 is that it continually encourages the reader to trick people into giving them the things they need for a prank.  “Get your parents to buy the catapult kit by telling them you want to be an engineer!”  “If someone asks why you want the dry ice, tell them you’re having a party!” etc.  I find it irritating enough that children whine and beg for things, but to have a book tell them to lie and manipulate people to give you what you want, as well, is a bit disgusting.

All in all, though, I feel the M3 is a safe enough book to give to kids.  They might learn a little science in the process, and you may even find a few things to do with them, as well.  While it got a little boring after a while, and some of pranks’ directions were a little confusing, it gives a reader plenty of chuckles and inspires creativity and fun.  I give Sir John Hargrave’s Mischief Maker’s Manual 3 1/2  out of 5 stars.

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The makers of the M3 have posted the following video on YouTube.  It shows how to commit 3 of the pranks detailed in the book.  Personally, I’d commence a beat down on my children for the “Coke Explosion,” which is why the book recommends you only pull pranks on people who can take a joke.   Like my mom always said, “Fun for one is no fun at all.”